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Friday, March 07, 2003     Page: 3A

OPINION
Our twins turned 16 the other day.
   
We planned a party in our garage with their friends but I figured something
would go wrong or they wouldn’t have fun. It’s a continuing concern. I worry
they get shortchanged because they have to share everything.
    Neither got to be the baby without the other butting in. Twins are like
that.
   
As the middle two of five kids born within six years, the twins often found
themselves in the midst of chaos. We had to muddle through many years, relying
on the help of relatives, friends, sometimes even strangers.
   
Which brings me back to this birthday celebration.
   
In addition to the party, we organized a complex birthday scavenger hunt.
Carrying a page of clues, teams of kids were challenged to trek through the
city and its outskirts to get typical people – this is where the strangers
come in – to do untypical things.
   
We knew there was great possibility of failure, despite an offer of movie
tickets to the winning team.
   
Success hinged on lots of unknowns: teenagers for one. Also crucial? Their
ability to cooperate, chaperones who wouldn’t get frazzled, and strangers who
could remember the fun of being a kid.
   
Even when approached by a bunch of scruffy kids in birthday hats. Even in
the face of odd requests. Even with the video camera running.
   
Ordinary people, amazing acts
   

   

   
“C’mon, just spit. You know, like brushing your teeth.”
   
My heartfelt thanks to every female senior citizen approached with this
request. Special kudos to the smiley old lady at Burger King. On tape, you put
those wimps on the Fear Factor TV show to shame.
   
“We need you to shake your butt, like Shakira.”
   
Again, thanks. Especially you, the grand dame they found in the Arena Hub
parking lot. If they ever do that Star Search for Seniors, you better hoof
your happy hips over to audition.
   
Greeters at Wal-Mart sang “Happy Birthday.” Convenience store clerks put
up with requests for directions to New York City. Guys working in pizza shops
took time to try to say happy birthday in Italian.
   
A very articulate lady at a Chinese restaurant not only agreed to speak in
her native tongue but sang too.
   
Video store workers played Charades to try to guess movie titles.
   
And, the best for last, one team found a clerk at a department store more
than willing to demonstrate how to properly attach a Depends diaper. Yo, hon,
we’re not sure you should have gone so far as to lie on the floor, but you
have a great future as a stand-up comic.
   
Or a lie-down one.
   
Who says there’s nothing to do in Wilkes-Barre? Who says teenagers are
lazy? Who says everyday people are unapproachable?
   
Who says old folks and kids can’t get along? Certainly no one we have on
tape.
   
Especially not the nice old fella who agreed to take out his dentures. OK,
he was someone’s relative, but he jumped at the chance to spread some cheer.
Lots of, er, gumption there. And a big old happy birthday smile.
   
He even pumped his fist in the air to celebrate – twice.
   
I like to think it was once for each of the twins.
   
Call Iseman at 829-7176 or e-mail davei@leader.net.