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“All you need to see,” a former, albeit reluctant, fan of “The Bachelor” texted Monday during the penultimate episode, “The Women Tell All.” That’s when citizens of this fabled “America” sit in studio audience to watch the season’s “most memorable” dismissed dames return to flaunt their ability to move on after getting booted from one of television’s most notable dens of iniquity.
Ex-fan has concluded you can now skip the entire season, tune into the tell-all and know all you need to know to watch the finale. (This season’s is at 8 p.m. Monday on ABC.)
As show fans knew going in, the two remaining women – executive assistant Chantal O’Brien, “the slapper,” and event planner Emily Maynard, the racing widow, weren’t invited to the lead-up tell-all. Instead, Brad dutifully gushed about his eternal love for an unidentified one of them while his castoffs publicly smiled but secretly seethed. Interesting enough, O’Brien and Maynard are the first pair of finalists who’ve both been married before.
But the tell-all’s really not about them, of course. It’s about giving brazen baddies like Michelle a chance to redeem themselves (Did she? Eh … ) and mostly unscathed almost-winners the chance to “audition” to become the next Bachelorette. (Sure, they don’t officially say that, but we all know it’s happening.) Ashley Hebert, with new brown hair and long bangs, performed admirably, and speculation is already rampant she’s the one.
Meanwhile, will it be the feisty, raven-haired, dark-eyed Chantal or the demure, doe-eyed, Southern belle Emily our cowboy commitment-phobe will take home to Texas and Mama?
Oh, delicious Monday.