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Another adult several years from retirement age emailed me, seeking my input about a few concerns, professional and spiritual. This highly educated person, whom I will refer to as Julie, was churning about disappointments in a career trajectory that not only had taken a distressing turn, it had all but flatlined.
The backstory is familiar to those like Julie who have wanted to pursue what they either believe, or know, to be their true course. But so often, heartbreakingly so, many will find it impossible to make a lavish living in their preferred field. The starving artist trope is a conundrum not isolated to creatives.
Especially with seasoned professionals who have enjoyed stable financial ground for a good long time, slipping into depression because their career is stalling is a real danger. Financial obstacles can suddenly seem insurmountable. These money heartaches can begin to wear down those who have aspirations for far more, and who see they are running out of time.
The quandary was easy for me to summarize: How could Julie move ahead, toward greater fulfillment in life, if Julie couldn’t do the work that she seems meant to, best suited, to do?
G: Money problems frequently arise from ditching one decent paycheck in order to pursue an irresistible passion project. Yet even a prolonged struggle over money usually won’t completely kill off the dream, some say fantasy, of being able to do something more with one’s life, other than just pay the bills.
These visions of achieving an ultimate work situation can become such a strong lure of the siren that it persists well beyond reason, or one’s physical and mental capabilities. It can rapidly turn what appears to have been a comfortable, healthy lifestyle, into a pattern of panic attacks and mental instability that even more money won’t significantly improve.
On just about any job there are other options, besides earning money, that can generate sustained sources of happiness. Achieving that profound level of joy, that feels like it exceeds any material gain from one’s labor, requires a wake-up call that brings a radical shift in attitude, and with it some overdue spiritual maturation.
Once that expansion arrives (sometimes it requires the help of a counselor or mentor, and a bit of perspective from history) it carries with it a bonus: The personal growth will apply across many areas of life, not just employment.
My parents, and many seniors who are now retired, arrived at their spot of peace through varied experiences. Theirs were not necessarily unique events, nor particularly universal employment situations. But from their many decades of working at all sorts of jobs that were mostly considered “mediocre” at best, they still were able to succeed in creating great rewards for themselves.
The beauty came from not feeling for long, or being made to feel, like they were settling for less or that they deserved to be somewhere better.
I am talking about more than a few generations of workers who may have had advanced degrees, or else barely got through eighth grade, or may have had some military or technical training. But those people who had gotten happy with their station, whatever the station was, had graduated with honors from the school of hard knocks. They knew they were the better for it, to boot.
From learning on the job, doing work that at times may have been viewed as being beneath anyone, to getting into the corner offices, these professionals and low-skilled earners figured out that only they themselves could enhance their satisfaction being on the job.
How did they achieve that even when the tasks were monotonous and rote? How did they do this under many challenging pressures and through uncertain times? They simply faced the truth of their situation, the big picture, and discovered what mattered most to them. They looked for new challenges to test their intellect and skills and they took satisfaction in completing good work.
Like many who have been in the work force for any length of time, whether self-employed or not, I too have felt periodic urges to reevaluate my personal goals and actual positions. I have had to consider overall satisfaction with a number of different jobs. This happened primarily because there had been a change either in administration, or workload tasks and hours.
Early in my career there was one job that I chose to quit over a wage increase. I don’t think I was there a full year when the amount I was offered revealed to me a spiritual flaw in my boss. I have seen that same flaw in corporations, and even in family members and friends: stinginess.
There are for sure some things at work that sting worse than being denied a fair wage or raise.
What Julie’s email brought to mind are some of the ways I chose to move through my own tough professional phases. What I recall are emotional situations that I inadvertently made more difficult for myself because I had either resisted taking the reasonable advice of others, or else I did not have suitable guidance at all.
What may have been able to help reduce the stress caused from feeling/being stuck in a less than ideal environment would have been some certainty that this too shall pass.
Developing enduring values of goodness, kindness, compassion and gratitude can also elevate any situation to be the vehicle for achieving a greater level of empowerment. These traits help to keep intact and grow self-esteem and dignity. With them, every moment can seem like the right place to be, even when still striving to get to the next level of success.
Email Giselle with your question at GiselleMassi@gmail.com or send mail: Giselle Massi, P.O. Box 991, Evergreen, CO 80437. For more info and to read previous columns, go to www.gisellemassi.com