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You know you’re in the Wyoming Valley when …
… election season rolls around and the ballot contains at least two Urbans.
… the “spring thaw” is quickly followed by flood warnings, then wildfire season.
… city crews dutifully paint fresh, emerald green stripes on main streets each year to mark St. Patrick’s Day parade routes, while the yellow lines that separate opposing traffic fade into oblivion.
… Hugo Selenski is awaiting trial for something else he (allegedly) did.
… the earliest sign of spring isn’t the return of robins, but rather Blizzard lovers descending on Dairy Queen.
… radio personality Steve Corbett rails against the Friendly Sons of St. Patrick’s chauvinism while most women seemingly choose to ignore it.
… fans root for RailRiders, a team with three mascots: Champ, Quill and Mr. IncrediBall.
… a youth sports group declares it might have to discontinue because it’s been ripped off – by an officer in the sports group.
… a volunteer fire company declares it might have to discontinue because it’s been ripped off – by an officer in the fire company.
… potentially hundreds of Luzerne County’s dual-property owners – apparently confused by the question “Is this your primary residence” – claim tax breaks on both properties. And no one in county government flags the improper claims.
… a neighbor tells you she’s going to the Tubs, and you understand that’s a park in Plains Township, not a place for bubble baths.
… it’s difficult to tell whether certain social media messages and texts were sent by hormone-raging seventh-graders or their school teachers.
… Penguins are expected to play until May or June.
… Celtic Woman and other Irish performers pop up on WVIA-TV’s early March broadcast schedule as surely as the Trans-Siberian Orchestra at Christmas.
… someone issues yet another announcement about a pending sale and/or redevelopment plan for the long-vacant New Jersey Central train station in Wilkes-Barre’s Market Street Square complex.
… the snow recedes to reveal a new blanket of roadside litter, which, thankfully, thousands of local volunteers remove by late April.
… each new, community-enhancing idea is gauged by waiting to see if it works in Scranton.